I love having company, but I hate what it does to mine and Madelyns schedule / groove. I feel like we get out of synch and that I also look like a lazy bum. When we have company we tend to spend more time at home, more time playing on the floor listening to music or watching some kids show. Madelyn plays better if she has background noise, almost like she doesn't get bored as easily because there's always something changing. I tend to back off of my normal time with her to allow the "company" an opportunity to play with her a little more. I don't want to be the mom that hovers, but maybe it comes across that I am too slack, that I don't do enough. I let Madelyn explore and discover new things on her own terms. I don't confine her, I don't prevent every little bump she's going to get. She has to learn somehow.

Our normal day is packed full of activity, ever week day we have something going on out of the house. The weekends are our time to veg out with Chris.

I hate feeling like I have to defend myself as a mom, that I am constantly being judged by visiters to our home. I feel like I can't be myself because every choice is called into question. I guess I know that is how motherhood is, everyone plays backseat driver to your parenting. It sucks.

Just because I make different choices that some do doesn't make them better than me, it doesn't make me better than them. I make the choices that are best for my family, for my daughter and lastly for myself.

I guess I just need to not alter my life when company comes to town and just let them hang on for the ride.


Anonymous said…
You are an AWESOME mom. Madelyn is confident that no matter what she does, you are always there. Even when you leave her with the babysitter while you go to the dentist, I swear she was just waiting on you to come back. She just knew. If they are too worried about you, that just means they should be worried more about themselves. :)

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